Bidadari Bengal Self-Motivating

A cloudy day which would be nice to spend just at home. But here I am, working my brain off for another deadline. Why can't I be at this cafe without my macbook? I love it here, but I'd love it even more if I could just sit and read leasurely. Still have 3 unread novels and 3 missing bestfriends. This is only the first month. Can't imagine how the next 3 months will be like. Oh well, guess I'm just gonna have to sweat it out. Been like a crying sissy these past two days. No more of that. I'm Bidadari Bengal. I can go through anything. This is nothing compared to what a person with cancer must go through. I'm a perfectly healthy and happy woman! This is the way to succeed. I can do it. As long as the money's ready. :p

Pecah

Dan menangislah gue di taxi. Betapa tololnya. Crying over nothing. Stupid!!

Screw This!

Suddenly feeling alone. I already know I don't have a life off work. It always work work work. I miss my brother. I miss mom. I miss Bangbag. I can't even see my best friends. Either I can't make the time, or they're also busy. I want to have a real 'me' time. I need it.

Right now, I've just finished work and still stranded at the office. Menik and Kucil are having a good time in Bogor. Enjoy it, cuys. ;) Wish I could be there too.

Time flies today. I just saw my watch, and it's already half past ten, I'd thought it's still around 8 pm. Shit! I really don't have a life, do I? I'm hungry. I wanna have a day off. I wanna pamper myself at the spa. I wanna go home.

The boss all went home. The other guys are still here, and SMOKING. In this air-conned room. I'm stressed out. Suddenly the frustration just came, poof! And now I wanna cry. I hate them for this. I can't even tell them to go out if they need to smoke, because they're playing this stupid computer games. And I won't go out too. This is my place, too. I have a right to be here, and they don't have a right to smoke here! Dickheads!

Dammit! I think I'm gonna cry! Fuck this! I'm going home! Screw you all!

Element - Bukan Orang Suci

BUKAN ORANG SUCI - Element

Mestinya kau mengerti
Saat pertama kali
Kala kau peluk diriku

Jangan pernah biarkan
Diri terhanyut nafsu
Aku bukan orang suci

* Bukalah matamu berpaling dari diriku
Benamkan semua mimpi-mimpimu
Jujur pada hati masih banyak cinta menanti
Jangan kau harapkan aku

reff:

Lupakan semua rayu
Jangan kagumi aku
Karna ku tak cinta kamu

Mohon kau tinggalkan aku
Tak usah kau harap lagi
Karna cinta untukmu palsu

Tak perlu lagi sesali
Anggap tak pernah terjadi
Saat ku lepas dirimu

Pernahkah kau sadari
Aku tak pernah berjanji
Untuk setia padamu

repeat *
repeat reff

Mendadak keinget lagu ini. Dulu gue suka banget nyanyi lagu ini tanpa nyadar isi liriknya. Sekarang pas gue dengerin lagi, kok ternyata liriknya gue banget! Wakakakakakaa... Yups, gue emang bukan orang suci. Kalo baca blog gue dari awal, you'd know why. ;)

Nyampah 01302010

Sabtu mendung, gerimis keciiiil banget, mengantar kepergian si Bengal ke kantor. Euh, sebenernya siy yg nganter si Bengal tu supirnya sang kakak, trus mau bahas apa sih sebenernya ini? Hehee.

Au ah. Posting gak jelas. Nyampah lagi deh. Ehehehehee...

You're A Bad Boss If...

I found this BusinessWeek article about bad bosses here. I copied and pasted it here, along with my comment or review on how all those signs reflect one or more of my bosses. ;)

1. Don't Know Your Job

Illustration by David Foster

You're the invisible man, the one who doesn't delve into the details or pitch in. You insulate yourself, telling us it's "not my job" and to "just do it." We know your dirty secret: You're out of touch. It's time to step away from your precious spreadsheets and get your hands dirty. You can't channel talent, time, and tools if you don't know how they're already being deployed.

The problem here is you involve yourself too much and make every idea seems like yours while at first you seem to be rejecting all our ideas. But you ARE out of touch too, sometimes. You're totally the opposite of invisible, and that sometimes freaks us out.

2. Don't Listen

Illustration by David Foster

We've seen it all. You fiddle with your BlackBerry (RIMM) when we're speaking. You interrupt constantly to make your points. And you roll your eyes and grow impatient—unless you're talking. No matter, you disregard our input anyway. So we've given up; we don't come to you anymore. And we both suffer for it. If you want to succeed, rebuild that goodwill. It'll require time and toil, but the best relationships always do.

Oh hell, yeah! You totally does this all the time. And interrupt frequently with unimportant things. For example, we were discussing about a new concept for a client, then suddenly you cut it and said to no one in particular, 'Wait! I think we need a new scanner. Have someone get it by tomorrow.' Then you continued to other things unrelated to the things we need to actually discuss. Sweet, eh?

3. Closed-Minded

Illustration by David Foster

You're gifted and accomplished, the best and brightest. And that has made you susceptible to pride. Now, you're quick to reach conclusions. Everything is one-sided, with no room for discussion, differences, or dissent. You may view yourself as all-knowing, but conditions change. And talent doesn't stand for "my way or the highway" for long. Pride goeth before a fall. Question is, can you open up and adapt before then?

In a way, this reflects on my comment for point no 1 above. You do ask us for our opinions and inputs on every stuff. But before we even finish any sentences, you cut us and drop our ideas then talk about other different things. Honestly, we're sick of it, you know?

4. Poor Preparation

Illustration by David Foster

Another emergency meeting. Drop what you're doing, they need it now. We're changing direction and working late again. It's always last minute, make it up as you go along. Maybe it fosters teamwork and creativity sometimes, but you can only cry wolf so many times. In reality, the unexpected drama reflects your inability to set expectations, plan ahead, and think it through. And it's just wearing us down.

Well, need I say more? -_-'

5. Not Building Skills

Illustration by David Foster

"People are our most important asset." Well, it's empty rhetoric here. Maybe you want to be hands-off or encourage self-reliance. Whatever the intent, you're not helping us grow. And that's your real job as a manager: to broaden our outlook, push us beyond our comfort zones, exemplify the corporate values, and focus us on learning, serving, persevering, leading, and advancing. Don't take that responsibility lightly.

On one hand, you do try to encourage us. But on the other hand, you also smother us with your shit. Encourage us, my arse!!

6. Overzealous

Illustration by David Foster

History remembers the tyrants but rarely the subjects who did the heavy lifting. It's no different here. You've created a divide-and-conquer atmosphere, all stick and no carrot, where everyone should be the same workaholic reflection of you. Eventually, your bullying and rah-rah intensity produces one question: "Why?" You may think we should be in "for life," but what are you giving back in return for that blind loyalty?

Oh well, now I know why I don't have a life.

7. Don't Maintain Discipline

Illustration by David Foster

All the workers come and go as they please, living according to their own rules. No one knows who is where or doing what, and the result is chaos. Maybe you want to be our buddy—or experience how a sweat shop atmosphere fosters only resentment. Either way, coddling does no favors to anyone. Like it or not, you need to set rules and hold people accountable.

Err well, you don't let us go anywhere. You keep us here and watch us like a hawk. What you really need is a creative secretary who can make up a proposal. We are better than that. We actually have ideas, you moron!

8. Never Heard of Tact

Illustration by David Foster

You always remind us that we're replaceable and working at your pleasure. Yes, it's your legendary bluntness. Your talent and tenure shields you from scrutiny. Sadly, your lack of self-awareness results in everyone—superiors and reports—maligning or marginalizing you. Brains take you only so far; eventually, you'll need to build and nurture relationships. And that requires people skills: listening, charming, understanding, and compromising. Think you're up for that?

No problems here.

9. Lack Influence

Illustration by David Foster

It's funny how we're usually last to get face time and resources. Our mission is vital and performance exceeds expectations. You'd like to believe it's jealousy, but maybe the messenger is undercutting the message. Look at your variables: appearance, body language, and speaking and writing styles. Do you always convey the image of a polished professional who can work in a team and get the job done? If you can't, you'll never get anyone's ear.

Ha! Whenever you try to project your know-it-all personality, I don't think they buy it, Sir. You're kind outdated and basic. :p

10. Blindside Us

Illustration by David Foster

Ah, there's nothing like a surprise. Whether you're singling us out in public or ambushing us in private, you're not afraid to render judgments and deliver lectures. Despite our advanced degrees and track records, you still treat us as servants. Instead of dropping the news all at once, give us fair warning when our performance doesn't meet expectations. Always take action immediately—and discreetly.

Seriously? You have no problems on this. You're okay. But still, you need to see the other points above. :)



So, see? There. You'll see why we're all frustrated, one way or another. *Sigh*

01282010, 11:30 am

Semalem mampir di Pizza Hut waktu jalan pulang. Laper banget sih nggak. Tapi gue emosi aja. Udah musti nginep di kantor pada malem sebelumnya, sendirian di kantor berhantu itu, untung aja gak ada yang gangguin. Ato mungkin ada, cuman gue aja yang gak nyadar, maklum gak sensitif. Hihiks... Trus gue semaleman itu kelaperan banget, gak ada yang bisa disuruh beli makanan, stok makanan instan gak ada, mau pesan delivery tapi gak pegang cash. Sengsara aja. Trus gak sempet tidur. Emang nikmat banget yang namanya dunia kerja itu yak?

Paginya langsung dijemput bos untuk presentasi ke klien. Kelar siang, kirain udah boleh tidur dulu deh biarpun gak boleh pulang. Emang sih si bos justru langsung pulang, katanya mau tidur dulu 2 jam. Gue di drop di kantor, dan baru masuk udah digeret sama bos yang 1 lagi gara-gara ada proposal yang butuh diolah dikit lagi. Setelah itu, baru mau kabur ke meja gue, eeeh, malah lanjut meeting. Tega banget luu, boooos...

Akhirnya pulang malem juga. Gak ada bedanya sama hari kerja sibuk biasa. Hihii. Yaaah, itulah makanya gue emosi sampe impulsively mampir pas lewat Pizza Hut. Pesen macem2, dan abis semua loh! Ajiiiib...

*Setan!! Kenapa sih pas gue bisa konsen nge-blog malah banyak aja orang mondar-mandir di belakang gue?*