I was in a contemplative mood. And this is the result. Contemplating my past relationships and flings. Can you see the pattern in them? I'm pretty sure I have an aberration in my mind, aside of being plain hormonal, err, I mean horny.
Agy
The guy who was always in the back of my mind. Probably I am to be permanently curious. See, we started something but never got around to finish it properly the first time. Until we met again, and started a fling. Even that went intermittently and then wore off. Still, we left each other hanging. Sucks, huh?
Rex
Rex, hmm. One of my failure in nonexistent relationship. Married with kids, has a gaylike attitude, but he seemed rough at the start. But well hey, that's what happens when you jumped into a fling too soon. A lesson learned, the hard way.
Perry
A married Bataknese who's in a critical marriage condition. The backup guy who I had let go. Can't imagine myself with him for a long term, but at that time, you know what they say: dibuang sayang :p. But when he said he's ready to go through a separation with wifey and dared to propose to me, that's the end. I wasn't a girl looking for commitment. Damn, commitments scare me more than Count Dracula!
Eric
An interesting guy. He always makes the first move but sometimes acts all innocent. Knows he's attractive and has his own groupies. Seeming aloof with them and treating everyone the same. But when they're not around, then he makes his hands available and keeps hugging and touching me and making sexual innuendos. Must be careful with him, I already knowingly make him as my second resort whenever I have a conflict with Joe. And yeah, he's married.
Ben
My first kosher boyfriend, which turned out like having no boyfriend at all. No thrills, no sparks, well probably a one way spark. His way. :p Well, no more kosher than Mbul. He's actually a divorcee with a daughter. He tried to hide his status from me, but I'm not stupid. It's not like I minded, all my relationships before him had been with married guys, so his status was actually an improvement. Or so I thought.
Wes
A single guy, and one of my weakness. I actually have regrets that I led him on, especially that now I have Joe. But it's kinda hard to blow his bubble and deflate him, even though I know I'm not that into him now. So, he's turning into a liability. It scares me whenever I thought how attracted I was to him at the start of or fling, and how turned off I am now.
Jimmy
The guy who escaped untouched. A two way attraction, he even made plans of sexual positions he wanted to experiment with me, hahahaha. But he's too chicken to jump me in reality, and I'm a bit turned off by his indecision. Though I didn't mind ruining his ideals so he'd see the world as I did. Idealistic sucks, my friends. The flirting was fun while it lasts, though.
CrewCut
A superfling. Wow. What a rebound guy. Always available for me. He even said he loved me. But I know better than to snatch him away from wifey. Anyways, serious relationships were turnoffs. Pfffft...
Mbul
Not many people can say that they have a loved one who passed away, who died and left you hanging. Damnit, Mbul! He saved me from Alv. I was happy for the first time, and felt so free when we started seeing each other. but apparently He had other plan. Rest in peace, Mbul. Hope your son grows to be a good person.
Alv
A piece of shit, a retard, a junkard, an asshole, a bully, an abuser, a coward. 5 years of abuse, and i won't have any of that anymore. I'm free as a bird. Or so I thought until I met, well, Joe.
Joe
Well, that's for another story. :p
Tuesday, April 14, 2015
Monday, June 30, 2014
Call It Magic
Call it magic.
The way things fold whenever I start something with a new guy. Whether it a relationship or just a fling.
The waiting.
The feeling of delicious anticipation. Butterflies in my stomach. Making no assumption that he's already into me.
The rush.
The thrilling blood coursing through my veins, willing him to kiss me. To violate me.
The willing.
I believe in the power of will. I believe in my power of attraction. I believe in my willpower to attract the guys I want.
Call it magic.
Call it magic whenever I have my first kiss with a new guy. Yes, butterflies, thrills, attraction, magic.
Call it magic.
Call it magic when my power shot through them and have their defense crumbles.
Call it magic when I get connected to a new guy and we fly together. Fly until the magic wears off and someone else catch my attention.
Pure magic.
*album of the moment: Ghost Stories - Coldplay*
The way things fold whenever I start something with a new guy. Whether it a relationship or just a fling.
The waiting.
The feeling of delicious anticipation. Butterflies in my stomach. Making no assumption that he's already into me.
The rush.
The thrilling blood coursing through my veins, willing him to kiss me. To violate me.
The willing.
I believe in the power of will. I believe in my power of attraction. I believe in my willpower to attract the guys I want.
Call it magic.
Call it magic whenever I have my first kiss with a new guy. Yes, butterflies, thrills, attraction, magic.
Call it magic.
Call it magic when my power shot through them and have their defense crumbles.
Call it magic when I get connected to a new guy and we fly together. Fly until the magic wears off and someone else catch my attention.
Pure magic.
*album of the moment: Ghost Stories - Coldplay*
Monday, February 10, 2014
Macklemore - Thrift Shop
[Hook: Wanz]
I'm gonna pop some tags
Only got twenty dollars in my pocket
I, I, I'm hunting
Looking for a come up
This is fuckin awesome
I'm gonna pop some tags
Only got twenty dollars in my pocket
I, I, I'm hunting
Looking for a come up
This is fuckin awesome
[Verse One: Macklemore]
Walk in the club like what up? I got a big cock
Nah, Im just pumped up, bought some shit from the thrift shop
Ice on the fringe is so damn frosty
People like Damn, thats a cold ass honkey
Rolling in hella, headed to the mezzanine
Dressed in all pink except my gator shoes, those are green
Draped in a leopard mink, girl standing next to me
Probably shoulda washed this, smells like R.Kelly sheets, piss
But shit, it was 99 cents, buy it, cop it and washing it
Bout to go and get some compliments, passing up on those moccasins
Walk in the club like what up? I got a big cock
Nah, Im just pumped up, bought some shit from the thrift shop
Ice on the fringe is so damn frosty
People like Damn, thats a cold ass honkey
Rolling in hella, headed to the mezzanine
Dressed in all pink except my gator shoes, those are green
Draped in a leopard mink, girl standing next to me
Probably shoulda washed this, smells like R.Kelly sheets, piss
But shit, it was 99 cents, buy it, cop it and washing it
Bout to go and get some compliments, passing up on those moccasins
Someone else has been walking in, bummy and grungy, Fuck it
I am stunting and flossing and saving my money and I am halla happy
Thats a bargain Bitch,
Imma take your grandpa style, Imma take your grandpa style, no for real, ask your grandpa
Can I have his hand-me-downs? (thank you)
Velour jumpsuit and some house slippers,
dookie brown leather jacket that I found digging.
They had a broken keyboard, I bought a broken keyboard
I bought a ski blanket, then I bought a knee board
Hello, hello, my ace man, my Mello
John Wayne aint got nothing on my fringe game, hell no
I could take some Pro Wings, make them cool, sell those
The sneaker heads would be like Ah, he got the Velcros
I am stunting and flossing and saving my money and I am halla happy
Thats a bargain Bitch,
Imma take your grandpa style, Imma take your grandpa style, no for real, ask your grandpa
Can I have his hand-me-downs? (thank you)
Velour jumpsuit and some house slippers,
dookie brown leather jacket that I found digging.
They had a broken keyboard, I bought a broken keyboard
I bought a ski blanket, then I bought a knee board
Hello, hello, my ace man, my Mello
John Wayne aint got nothing on my fringe game, hell no
I could take some Pro Wings, make them cool, sell those
The sneaker heads would be like Ah, he got the Velcros
[Hook: Wanz]
I'm gonna pop some tags
Only got twenty dollars in my pocket
I, I, I'm hunting
Looking for a come up
This is fuckin awesome 2x
I'm gonna pop some tags
Only got twenty dollars in my pocket
I, I, I'm hunting
Looking for a come up
This is fuckin awesome 2x
[Verse Two: Macklemore]
What you know about rocking a wolf on your noggin?
What you knowing about wearing a fur fox skin?
Im digging, Im digging, Im searching right through that luggage
One mans trash, thats another mans come up
Thank your granddad for donating that plaid button up shirt
Cause right now, Im up in her skirt
Im at the Good will, you can find me in the bins
Im that sucker, sucker searching in the section
Your grammy, your aunty, your momma, your mammy
Ill take those flannel zebra jammies, second hand and Ill rock that mother fucker
The built in onsies with the socks on the mother fucker
I hit the party and they stop in that mother fucker
They be like Oh that Gucci, thats hella tight
Im like Yo, thats fifty dollars for a t-shirt
Limited edition, lets do some simple addition
Fifty dollars for a t-shirt, thats just some ignorant bitch shit
I call that getting swindled and pimped, shit
I call that getting tricked by a business, that shirts hella don't
And having the same one as six other people in this club is a hella don't
Peep game, come take a look through my telescope
Trying to get girls from a brand? Man you hella wont, man you hella wont
(little girl) goodwill, be popping tags, yeah-ah-ah
[Hook: Wanz]
I'm gonna pop some tags
Only got twenty dollars in my pocket
I, I, I'm hunting
Looking for a come up
This is fuckin awesome
I'm gonna pop some tags
Only got twenty dollars in my pocket
I, I, I'm hunting
Looking for a come up
This is fuckin awesome
[Bridge: Wanz]
I wear your granddad's clothes, I look incredible
Im in this big ass coat from that thrift shop down the road
I wear your granddad's clothes, I look incredible
Im in this big ass coat from that thrift shop down the road
I wear your granddad's clothes, I look incredible
Im in this big ass coat from that thrift shop down the road
I wear your granddad's clothes, I look incredible
Im in this big ass coat from that thrift shop down the road
[Hook: Wanz]
I'm gonna pop some tags
Only got twenty dollars in my pocket
I, I, I'm hunting
Looking for a come up
This is fuckin awesome
I'm gonna pop some tags
Only got twenty dollars in my pocket
I, I, I'm hunting
Looking for a come up
This is fuckin awesome
(little girl) Is that your Grandma's coat? Hee hee!
Monday, January 27, 2014
Seminggu Yang Pedas
Seminggu belakangan ini, nafsu menyantap makanan super pedas semakin menggila. Setiap hari, gue makan di Warung Penyet Bu Kris, Bebek Ireng Cak Baz, Bebek Goreng Pak Joko Putro, Bebek Goreng H. Slamet, dan Ramen Sanpachi.
Entah kenapa, tiap gue ke Warung Bu Kris, pas browsing menunya yang banyak itu, gue selalu end up dengan Lele Penyet Super Pedas, Tahu Telor, dan Sayur Asem. Biarpun di awal udah bayangin ayam goreng, bebek goreng, gurame, tempe/tahu, telor, baksi, udang, teri, dll, tetep aja pesennya lele. Heran. Daaan, efek makan disini adalah bibir merah, keringetan sekujur tubuh, perut begah, dan pose nyender dengan mata sayu bego. Dua minggu sekali ke sini masih oke lah. Tapi seminggu sekali atau dua kali, jadi flat rasanya. Cuma dapat kenyang doang.
Nah, kalo cowok gue senengnya Bebek Ireng Cak Baz. Gue sebenernya sih biasa aja sama sambel di sini. Kurang gahar. Tapi Joe suka, ya kesini deh kadang-kadang. Nah, jangan pesen yang lain selain bebek peking, karena cuma dia yang dagingnya paling empuk sampe nyaris copot dari tulang. Kalo varian bebek yang lainnya pada lumayan alot. Bagusnya di sini lo bebas ambil sambelnya, karena udah tersaji di meja.
Bebek Goreng Pak Joko Putro ini emang edan. Favorit gue selain bebek goreng adalah paru goreng, tahu, dan SAMBAL SETAN yang musti dipesan khusus. Asli SETAN nih sambel. Sukaaaaa!! Sayur asemnya juga oke loh. Kalo Joe pasti tambah pete. Gue sih jauh-jauh dari benda terkutuk itu. Haduh, jadi pengen ke sana lagi. Ntar malem boleh juga kayaknya. Gak bakal bosen kalo ke sini tiap hari sih. :D
Kalo Bebek Goreng H. Slamet sih gak usah dibahas lah ya. Emangnya masih ada yang belum pernah makan di sana? Pesanan gue, jelas paha dan kepala goreng, tahu/tempe kalo ada, tambah nasi 1/2, dan ekstra 2 sambal. Untuk gue doang. Sambal korek Slamet, I heart you, beibeh...
Ramen Sanpachi. Hmmm... Emang pedes dan bikin keringatan. Apalagi yang pake level kayak Jigoku Ramen itu. Gue biasanya sih mentok di level 8 aja. Itu udah cukup bikin mules, biarpun kadang lidah gue masih mencari sesuatu yang nendang. Sayangnya, kalo tambah level pedes, berarti rasanya makin asiiiin, padahal mah porsi mie dan kuahnya ya tetep segitu aja. Kalo mau ya lo pesen level yang kira-kira keasinannya gak bikin rambut lo rontok, terus minta tambah rawit merah deh. Yang paling oke di sini menurut gue justru bukan ramen, tapi tori karaage-nya. Yang paling gak oke, service charge dan tax-nya. Rasanya lebih nendang daripada jigoku level 15. Cih!
Dan bisa ngebahas makanan-makanan bersambel itu, jadi pengen aja makan lagi. Tapi gue bingung, seminggu ini malah belum mules dan belum boker. Sadis, sialan. Perut udah gede banget gini, belum kebuang isinya. Perlu cabe yang kayak gimana lagi sih biar bisa nguras isi perut?
Eh, ada tukang bakso lewat! Tuang sambel ke mangkok trus tambahin bakso dan kuah enak juga kayaknya. :p
Entah kenapa, tiap gue ke Warung Bu Kris, pas browsing menunya yang banyak itu, gue selalu end up dengan Lele Penyet Super Pedas, Tahu Telor, dan Sayur Asem. Biarpun di awal udah bayangin ayam goreng, bebek goreng, gurame, tempe/tahu, telor, baksi, udang, teri, dll, tetep aja pesennya lele. Heran. Daaan, efek makan disini adalah bibir merah, keringetan sekujur tubuh, perut begah, dan pose nyender dengan mata sayu bego. Dua minggu sekali ke sini masih oke lah. Tapi seminggu sekali atau dua kali, jadi flat rasanya. Cuma dapat kenyang doang.
Nah, kalo cowok gue senengnya Bebek Ireng Cak Baz. Gue sebenernya sih biasa aja sama sambel di sini. Kurang gahar. Tapi Joe suka, ya kesini deh kadang-kadang. Nah, jangan pesen yang lain selain bebek peking, karena cuma dia yang dagingnya paling empuk sampe nyaris copot dari tulang. Kalo varian bebek yang lainnya pada lumayan alot. Bagusnya di sini lo bebas ambil sambelnya, karena udah tersaji di meja.
Bebek Goreng Pak Joko Putro ini emang edan. Favorit gue selain bebek goreng adalah paru goreng, tahu, dan SAMBAL SETAN yang musti dipesan khusus. Asli SETAN nih sambel. Sukaaaaa!! Sayur asemnya juga oke loh. Kalo Joe pasti tambah pete. Gue sih jauh-jauh dari benda terkutuk itu. Haduh, jadi pengen ke sana lagi. Ntar malem boleh juga kayaknya. Gak bakal bosen kalo ke sini tiap hari sih. :D
Kalo Bebek Goreng H. Slamet sih gak usah dibahas lah ya. Emangnya masih ada yang belum pernah makan di sana? Pesanan gue, jelas paha dan kepala goreng, tahu/tempe kalo ada, tambah nasi 1/2, dan ekstra 2 sambal. Untuk gue doang. Sambal korek Slamet, I heart you, beibeh...
Ramen Sanpachi. Hmmm... Emang pedes dan bikin keringatan. Apalagi yang pake level kayak Jigoku Ramen itu. Gue biasanya sih mentok di level 8 aja. Itu udah cukup bikin mules, biarpun kadang lidah gue masih mencari sesuatu yang nendang. Sayangnya, kalo tambah level pedes, berarti rasanya makin asiiiin, padahal mah porsi mie dan kuahnya ya tetep segitu aja. Kalo mau ya lo pesen level yang kira-kira keasinannya gak bikin rambut lo rontok, terus minta tambah rawit merah deh. Yang paling oke di sini menurut gue justru bukan ramen, tapi tori karaage-nya. Yang paling gak oke, service charge dan tax-nya. Rasanya lebih nendang daripada jigoku level 15. Cih!
Dan bisa ngebahas makanan-makanan bersambel itu, jadi pengen aja makan lagi. Tapi gue bingung, seminggu ini malah belum mules dan belum boker. Sadis, sialan. Perut udah gede banget gini, belum kebuang isinya. Perlu cabe yang kayak gimana lagi sih biar bisa nguras isi perut?
Eh, ada tukang bakso lewat! Tuang sambel ke mangkok trus tambahin bakso dan kuah enak juga kayaknya. :p
Thursday, September 05, 2013
Lyric: Imagine Dragons - Radioactive
Whoa, oh, oh
Whoa, oh, oh
Whoa, oh, oh
Whoa
I'm waking up to ash and dust
I wipe my brow and I sweat my rust
I'm breathing in the chemicals
(inhale) (exhale)
Whoa, oh, oh
Whoa, oh, oh
Whoa
I'm waking up to ash and dust
I wipe my brow and I sweat my rust
I'm breathing in the chemicals
(inhale) (exhale)
I'm breaking in, shaping up, then checking out of the prison bus
This is it, the apocalypse
Whoa
This is it, the apocalypse
Whoa
I'm waking up, I feel it in my bones
Enough to make my systems blow
Welcome to the new age, to the new age
Welcome to the new age, to the new age
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, I'm radioactive, radioactive
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, I'm radioactive, radioactive
Enough to make my systems blow
Welcome to the new age, to the new age
Welcome to the new age, to the new age
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, I'm radioactive, radioactive
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, I'm radioactive, radioactive
I raise my flags, don my clothes
It's a revolution, I suppose
We're painted red to fit right in
Whoa
It's a revolution, I suppose
We're painted red to fit right in
Whoa
I'm breaking in, shaping up, then checking out on the prison bus
This is it, the apocalypse
Whoa
This is it, the apocalypse
Whoa
I'm waking up, I feel it in my bones
Enough to make my systems blow
Welcome to the new age, to the new age
Welcome to the new age, to the new age
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, I'm radioactive, radioactive
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, I'm radioactive, radioactive
Enough to make my systems blow
Welcome to the new age, to the new age
Welcome to the new age, to the new age
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, I'm radioactive, radioactive
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, I'm radioactive, radioactive
All systems go, the sun hasn't died
Deep in my bones, straight from inside
Deep in my bones, straight from inside
I'm waking up, I feel it in my bones
Enough to make my systems blow
Welcome to the new age, to the new age
Welcome to the new age, to the new age
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, I'm radioactive, radioactive
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, I'm radioactive, radioactive
Enough to make my systems blow
Welcome to the new age, to the new age
Welcome to the new age, to the new age
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, I'm radioactive, radioactive
Whoa, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa, oh, oh, oh, I'm radioactive, radioactive
Thursday, July 25, 2013
Just A Quick 'Update'
Well, just a quick update. I'm actually getting married!
...
...
...
BOO!!!
Okay, I lied.
Fooled you, didn't I? No? Okay. Worth a try, anyway.
:D
...
...
...
BOO!!!
Okay, I lied.
Fooled you, didn't I? No? Okay. Worth a try, anyway.
:D
Saturday, June 29, 2013
Bengal is Grateful
Just wanna take the time to say grace and be thankful for this good life. Work is great at the moment. Totally busy but can't complain about the money, though... The only bad thing is I can't play with my niece, Bangbag, as much as I want to.
And the thing that I am most grateful for is Joe. He came into my life, wormed his way into my heart, and makes me fall in love with him. The first guy I could imagine to really spend the rest of my life with. A unique guy with principal. Anti-mainstream but also old-fashioned in some ways. He is many things. He also has faults. But he loves me, and I love him.
And I never thought I could be this corny. But, it's okay because I'm in love. It's a perfect excuse to be corny and silly, right? ;)
Life IS good. And I hope it lasts.
Thank you, God...
And the thing that I am most grateful for is Joe. He came into my life, wormed his way into my heart, and makes me fall in love with him. The first guy I could imagine to really spend the rest of my life with. A unique guy with principal. Anti-mainstream but also old-fashioned in some ways. He is many things. He also has faults. But he loves me, and I love him.
And I never thought I could be this corny. But, it's okay because I'm in love. It's a perfect excuse to be corny and silly, right? ;)
Life IS good. And I hope it lasts.
Thank you, God...
Saturday, April 20, 2013
Bengal vs Besties vs Boys
Life is not so okay. Diva has been too busy going here and there with her boyfriend, Menik is busy with her projects, Kucil is BUSY with her 3 babies (yes, three), and I have too many flings as well as projects at the moment.
Consider Diva is gone. It's no use asking her to meet or have time together like we used to do, she has totally given her life and time to her boyfriend. I can't help but thinking she's changed and became stupid. Jealous? Me? I guess. But putting works aside, I could always spend time with my friends. Not like someone I know. Tsk!
Menik is stressed out with her own works. Big project, big money, and little sleep. Poor her. But, we still meet at least once a week, though.
Kucil, oh my God! She gave birth to twins! And couldn't find any good babysitter till now. So, she resigned from her job, and now dedicates her time fully as a mom and wife. Something I still can't imagine I could do. :p
I miss my friends. I miss my family. Most of my time is spent in my office. Initially, I always ask Diva if she cared to go anywhere with me. But she always said that she's watching her guy performing at gigs. Meaning if I wanted to see her, I had to go to those gigs. I am so bored with his bands. I want to watch others, which Diva won't go until hell freezes over. Well, unless her guy decides he wanted to go too. Stupid! Meanwhile, it's hard for Kucil to leave her house even for lunch because she needs to bring her 3 kids along. Whoa!
So, probably the guys I'm currently with have become some kind of rebounds for me. Hahahahaa! Jeez, I'm so fucking twisted. Using guys because the best friends are all otherwise occupied instead of the other way around. :p
See here, I'm still with Rex. He's still kind of the one for me now, even if I know that I should ditch him. It's funny, because I sometimes picture us together like a sugar daddy and his girl. He got so angry when his bass player asked for my Blackberry Messenger PIN, and it would be weird if I refuse, right? Jealous as he is, I'm also still in a relationshit, yep you read that right, with Perry. This backup guy is even more the jealous type, tsk. He got jealous when his backup guitarist took me home, and it was totally innocent. Wes is still around, and we enjoy many stolen moments at work. Hohohohoo... So, I don't mind that much if I have to work late or even on weekends because I know that I could always count on him to, errr, give me pleasure *hit my own head with brick*. And then Joe, a pop singer I met in a mixing studio for a project. He fucks well, you see. ;)
Rex's bass player is still throwing codes at me, trying so hard to bed me. His fingers are enjoyable, but I don't think it's a good idea to say yes at the moment. Another guy is Eric, which I almost kiss that other night. He's an accomplished flirt, I gotta say. I should keep my eyes open when he's around. Can't hurt to be extra alert. Don't wanna miss a kiss, right? Hehehee...
Anyways, the numero uno bestie, aka Syd, is coming home from Oz for a few days next week. I miss her a lot that I'm taking days off from work when she's here. Can't hardly wait until she arrives. So, yeah, I expect I'll have a blast with her. Woot! :D
Consider Diva is gone. It's no use asking her to meet or have time together like we used to do, she has totally given her life and time to her boyfriend. I can't help but thinking she's changed and became stupid. Jealous? Me? I guess. But putting works aside, I could always spend time with my friends. Not like someone I know. Tsk!
Menik is stressed out with her own works. Big project, big money, and little sleep. Poor her. But, we still meet at least once a week, though.
Kucil, oh my God! She gave birth to twins! And couldn't find any good babysitter till now. So, she resigned from her job, and now dedicates her time fully as a mom and wife. Something I still can't imagine I could do. :p
I miss my friends. I miss my family. Most of my time is spent in my office. Initially, I always ask Diva if she cared to go anywhere with me. But she always said that she's watching her guy performing at gigs. Meaning if I wanted to see her, I had to go to those gigs. I am so bored with his bands. I want to watch others, which Diva won't go until hell freezes over. Well, unless her guy decides he wanted to go too. Stupid! Meanwhile, it's hard for Kucil to leave her house even for lunch because she needs to bring her 3 kids along. Whoa!
So, probably the guys I'm currently with have become some kind of rebounds for me. Hahahahaa! Jeez, I'm so fucking twisted. Using guys because the best friends are all otherwise occupied instead of the other way around. :p
See here, I'm still with Rex. He's still kind of the one for me now, even if I know that I should ditch him. It's funny, because I sometimes picture us together like a sugar daddy and his girl. He got so angry when his bass player asked for my Blackberry Messenger PIN, and it would be weird if I refuse, right? Jealous as he is, I'm also still in a relationshit, yep you read that right, with Perry. This backup guy is even more the jealous type, tsk. He got jealous when his backup guitarist took me home, and it was totally innocent. Wes is still around, and we enjoy many stolen moments at work. Hohohohoo... So, I don't mind that much if I have to work late or even on weekends because I know that I could always count on him to, errr, give me pleasure *hit my own head with brick*. And then Joe, a pop singer I met in a mixing studio for a project. He fucks well, you see. ;)
Rex's bass player is still throwing codes at me, trying so hard to bed me. His fingers are enjoyable, but I don't think it's a good idea to say yes at the moment. Another guy is Eric, which I almost kiss that other night. He's an accomplished flirt, I gotta say. I should keep my eyes open when he's around. Can't hurt to be extra alert. Don't wanna miss a kiss, right? Hehehee...
Anyways, the numero uno bestie, aka Syd, is coming home from Oz for a few days next week. I miss her a lot that I'm taking days off from work when she's here. Can't hardly wait until she arrives. So, yeah, I expect I'll have a blast with her. Woot! :D
Monday, December 17, 2012
Wes, Pt. 2
Note: This post should have been posted around September or October.
Wes gawe di kantor gue lagi selama beberapa minggu ini. Pas hari pertama dia nongol dia langsung cengar-cengir ngeliat gue kaget, soalnya gak ada yang ngasih tau kalo dia bakal kesini. Hahahaa... A nice surprise, nonetheless. Begitu dia duduk di sebelah gue, langsung kecium aroma wanginya yang khas. Huaaaa, langsung pengen nyenderin kepala di bahunya deh. :p
Ternyata gue kangen juga sama makhluk satu ini, biarpun cueknya setengah mampus. Ato guenya aja yang lagi haus belaian kali? Pokoknya sih karena posisi kerja dia deketan banget sama gue, seharian gue musti nyium wanginya dan dengerin suaranya yang dalem, bikin horny kampret! Tahan, Bengal! Tahaaan...
Seminggu pertama berhasil dilalui dengan aman dan sedikit ngilu menahan sesuatu. *cewek kok ngilu?* Hahahahaa... Masuk minggu kedua, langsung jeder halus.
Jadi, kantor lagi sepi soalnya ada yang lagi keluar, ada yang lagi tidur, ada yang lagi ke klien ato vendor. Di atas cuma ada gue dan Wes, sama si Jimmy, tapi dia di ruangan dalem. Gue pengen ngopi, jadi gue naik ke pantry atas. Becanda ajak si Wes ikut, 'Sayang, ikut aku naik yuk? Mumpung sepi...', sambil ngedipin mata centil tanpa berharap apa-apa. Eh, setan lewat, dia langsung bangun dari kursi, ambil cangkirnya yang kosong dan ngikutin gue. Sampe atas, masih santai, gue isi panci untuk rebus air. Baru nyalain api, Wes manggil dari pintu pantry. 'Pssst, sini...' Gue agak bingung, ngapain nih orang berdiri doang di situ.
'Ngapain lo disitu, Wes? Masuk aja kenapa?'
'Sini duluuu...'
Penasaran, gue samperin ke tempat dia berdiri. Begitu udah deket, tangannya narik gue, gue kaget kirain ada serangga ato apa. Gue ditarik sampe nabrak badannya, terus tangan sebelahnya narik kepala gue dan diciumlah bibir gue dengan suksesnya. Syiiiiiittt! Bego banget gue, ya? Segitu polosnya dan gak nyangka dia bakal beneran berani nyium gue! Ahahahahahaa...
Gue kaget beku, untung udah gak pegang cangkir ato panci. Bisa krompyang berisik dan bikin kehebohan kan. Terus dia berhenti dan melepas pelukannya. Ngeliatin gue sambil nyalain rokok. Gue kaget rada panas dingin dan kepala blank, cuma bisa ngeloyor ke kompor ngecek air. Terus balik lagi ke tempat dia. Berdiri di depan dia, liatin matanya, baru mau inisiatif nyium balik, eh udah keduluan. Rokoknya dibuang, gue dipepet ke tembok sebelah pintu pantry, dan abis deh gue diciumin dari bibir, leher, dan lain-lain. Tangan udah pada liar lah, tangan gue dan tangan dia udah gak jelas kemana-mana. Dan posisi kita tepat dibawah CCTV kantor, jadi gak keliatan juga di monitornya, hahahaha... Sinting.
Lagi asik grinding dan tangannya sibuk di dalem t-shirt gue, mendadak ada bunyi orang naik tangga. Bubaaar... Kita langsung beresin baju masing-masing, gue balik ke posisi depan kompor, dia nyalain rokok sok cool, padahal keliatan celananya berjendol gitu. Hihihihii... Ternyata si Jimmy yang naik dan gak pake ba-bi-bu langsung ngeloyor lewatin kita dan masuk ke mushola yang emang posisinya harus lewatin pantry.
Sport jantung? Banget. Puas? Gak. Mau lagi? Mau. Ada kesempatan? Gak ada sama sekali sampe sekarang.
Zzzzzzzzz....
Wes gawe di kantor gue lagi selama beberapa minggu ini. Pas hari pertama dia nongol dia langsung cengar-cengir ngeliat gue kaget, soalnya gak ada yang ngasih tau kalo dia bakal kesini. Hahahaa... A nice surprise, nonetheless. Begitu dia duduk di sebelah gue, langsung kecium aroma wanginya yang khas. Huaaaa, langsung pengen nyenderin kepala di bahunya deh. :p
Ternyata gue kangen juga sama makhluk satu ini, biarpun cueknya setengah mampus. Ato guenya aja yang lagi haus belaian kali? Pokoknya sih karena posisi kerja dia deketan banget sama gue, seharian gue musti nyium wanginya dan dengerin suaranya yang dalem, bikin horny kampret! Tahan, Bengal! Tahaaan...
Seminggu pertama berhasil dilalui dengan aman dan sedikit ngilu menahan sesuatu. *cewek kok ngilu?* Hahahahaa... Masuk minggu kedua, langsung jeder halus.
Jadi, kantor lagi sepi soalnya ada yang lagi keluar, ada yang lagi tidur, ada yang lagi ke klien ato vendor. Di atas cuma ada gue dan Wes, sama si Jimmy, tapi dia di ruangan dalem. Gue pengen ngopi, jadi gue naik ke pantry atas. Becanda ajak si Wes ikut, 'Sayang, ikut aku naik yuk? Mumpung sepi...', sambil ngedipin mata centil tanpa berharap apa-apa. Eh, setan lewat, dia langsung bangun dari kursi, ambil cangkirnya yang kosong dan ngikutin gue. Sampe atas, masih santai, gue isi panci untuk rebus air. Baru nyalain api, Wes manggil dari pintu pantry. 'Pssst, sini...' Gue agak bingung, ngapain nih orang berdiri doang di situ.
'Ngapain lo disitu, Wes? Masuk aja kenapa?'
'Sini duluuu...'
Penasaran, gue samperin ke tempat dia berdiri. Begitu udah deket, tangannya narik gue, gue kaget kirain ada serangga ato apa. Gue ditarik sampe nabrak badannya, terus tangan sebelahnya narik kepala gue dan diciumlah bibir gue dengan suksesnya. Syiiiiiittt! Bego banget gue, ya? Segitu polosnya dan gak nyangka dia bakal beneran berani nyium gue! Ahahahahahaa...
Gue kaget beku, untung udah gak pegang cangkir ato panci. Bisa krompyang berisik dan bikin kehebohan kan. Terus dia berhenti dan melepas pelukannya. Ngeliatin gue sambil nyalain rokok. Gue kaget rada panas dingin dan kepala blank, cuma bisa ngeloyor ke kompor ngecek air. Terus balik lagi ke tempat dia. Berdiri di depan dia, liatin matanya, baru mau inisiatif nyium balik, eh udah keduluan. Rokoknya dibuang, gue dipepet ke tembok sebelah pintu pantry, dan abis deh gue diciumin dari bibir, leher, dan lain-lain. Tangan udah pada liar lah, tangan gue dan tangan dia udah gak jelas kemana-mana. Dan posisi kita tepat dibawah CCTV kantor, jadi gak keliatan juga di monitornya, hahahaha... Sinting.
Lagi asik grinding dan tangannya sibuk di dalem t-shirt gue, mendadak ada bunyi orang naik tangga. Bubaaar... Kita langsung beresin baju masing-masing, gue balik ke posisi depan kompor, dia nyalain rokok sok cool, padahal keliatan celananya berjendol gitu. Hihihihii... Ternyata si Jimmy yang naik dan gak pake ba-bi-bu langsung ngeloyor lewatin kita dan masuk ke mushola yang emang posisinya harus lewatin pantry.
Sport jantung? Banget. Puas? Gak. Mau lagi? Mau. Ada kesempatan? Gak ada sama sekali sampe sekarang.
Zzzzzzzzz....
Friday, November 23, 2012
Rex's Deadly Text
He was performing on one of his gigs, and when he had a minute in between songs, he grabbed his BlackBerry and texted me 'Love you...'
*melted*
Damn you, Rex. I'm still trying to fight the growing feeling. Please don't make it any harder for me, hun... :')
And then he sang Whitesnake's Is This Love, with his eyes on me all the time.
*gulp*
Help!
*melted*
Damn you, Rex. I'm still trying to fight the growing feeling. Please don't make it any harder for me, hun... :')
And then he sang Whitesnake's Is This Love, with his eyes on me all the time.
*gulp*
Help!
Friday, November 16, 2012
Bengal Meets Rex
Rex, Rex, Rex...
Met this guy a few weeks ago at a pub. He subbed for the regular singer there that day. I couldn't remember what made us swapped BlackBerry PIN, but we did. No overwhelming attraction toward each other, but yeah, I was kinda eyeing him then. He was wearing all black, and he looked devilish, rugged, but somewhat like a regular guy. Admitting that he's over forty, he stood beside my barstool everytime there's a guest come up front and sang. People might think that we're old friends when in fact, we're not. A bit weird.
When the night was over, nothing else happened. He hugged me and kissed my cheeks, a bit lingeringly, but hey, that's just flirting, right? ;) And not until a week later that he started to text me through BBM. I had even almost forgotten about him. Convos were innocent. He was married with 2 kids. He works in legal. And he kept me company with his chats through my lonely nights in a tiny town in Sumatra about two weeks ago. And I was still oblivious to his motive. Hahahaa...
I'm not sure when was the specific moment that our chats turned suggestive. He kept joking that he was gonna send me a picture of his 'gun'. I brushed it off, thinking he was only testing me. Then the next day, he really did. Shiit! It was, uh, big. Big enough to render me speechless and made him worried that he had scared me away. At last, I responded and said something encouraging. After that, things escalated pretty quickly.
We met for a date earlier this week. His wife was out of town. But the damn thing is that I was having my period. So no real action, had to be satisfied with deep, long kisses that night. But we talked a lot, though. We made clear of our own positions in this so-called relationship. He told me about the hell hole he called home, and I told him that I have someone else on the side.
So, there. That's how we hooked up. And now I'm busy and he's busy and we still haven't fucked, yet.
Aaaaaaaagggghhhhh!!! Rex, fuck me, please!
Met this guy a few weeks ago at a pub. He subbed for the regular singer there that day. I couldn't remember what made us swapped BlackBerry PIN, but we did. No overwhelming attraction toward each other, but yeah, I was kinda eyeing him then. He was wearing all black, and he looked devilish, rugged, but somewhat like a regular guy. Admitting that he's over forty, he stood beside my barstool everytime there's a guest come up front and sang. People might think that we're old friends when in fact, we're not. A bit weird.
When the night was over, nothing else happened. He hugged me and kissed my cheeks, a bit lingeringly, but hey, that's just flirting, right? ;) And not until a week later that he started to text me through BBM. I had even almost forgotten about him. Convos were innocent. He was married with 2 kids. He works in legal. And he kept me company with his chats through my lonely nights in a tiny town in Sumatra about two weeks ago. And I was still oblivious to his motive. Hahahaa...
I'm not sure when was the specific moment that our chats turned suggestive. He kept joking that he was gonna send me a picture of his 'gun'. I brushed it off, thinking he was only testing me. Then the next day, he really did. Shiit! It was, uh, big. Big enough to render me speechless and made him worried that he had scared me away. At last, I responded and said something encouraging. After that, things escalated pretty quickly.
We met for a date earlier this week. His wife was out of town. But the damn thing is that I was having my period. So no real action, had to be satisfied with deep, long kisses that night. But we talked a lot, though. We made clear of our own positions in this so-called relationship. He told me about the hell hole he called home, and I told him that I have someone else on the side.
So, there. That's how we hooked up. And now I'm busy and he's busy and we still haven't fucked, yet.
Aaaaaaaagggghhhhh!!! Rex, fuck me, please!
Tuesday, October 09, 2012
@BidadariBengal on Twitter
I got a Twitter account, now. You can follow me, just click @BidadariBengal. :D
Err, being an anonymous account, I now can do the cowardly things such as bashing and trolling the people I don't like in real life. Still, strictly #nomention, of course. :p
And I can use this account to satisfy my curiosity about those sex accounts on Twitter, which I will not do with my real account. After all, a girl needs to jaga image juga kan, ciin...
Oh well, enjoy it. Follow me if you will. But I don't do that follback thingies. I only follow those I want to. No hard feelings. ;)
Err, being an anonymous account, I now can do the cowardly things such as bashing and trolling the people I don't like in real life. Still, strictly #nomention, of course. :p
And I can use this account to satisfy my curiosity about those sex accounts on Twitter, which I will not do with my real account. After all, a girl needs to jaga image juga kan, ciin...
Oh well, enjoy it. Follow me if you will. But I don't do that follback thingies. I only follow those I want to. No hard feelings. ;)
Friday, July 20, 2012
Somehow Interconnected
Yesterday was a day full of seemingly random moments which turned to be not so random after all. And it somehow got me contemplating and digging deep into my memory for whatever kinds of existence I have through. Big words for me. Big words that came out of little things.
I've been reading Dee's Supernova books for the past few days. I've finished Ksatria, Putri dan Bintang Jatuh and Akar and now about to start Petir. What she put into her stories are stuffs beyond my imagination. She somehow compiled so many seemingly syfy materials and rewrite it into her novels thus making it easy for her readers to understand the theories. Quantum physics, Freudian and the likes, Mandelbrot, I can't even recall the other names.
Her writings put me into a deja vu mode. Years ago, I read James Redfield's books. The first one was The Celestine Prophesy, followed by The Tenth Insight, then The Secret of Shambala. Basically, the first book told about many levels of insight. You need to go on your own journey to be able to acquire them. It's a somewhat spiritual journey. And you need to believe that everything in life is interconnected. There's always a reason behind every moment, every meeting, et cetera. Nothing is a coincidence. However small the event is, there is always a purpose behind it. To see the enhanced effect of a tiny event, think of The Butterfly Effect. ;) Redfield has made me a believer, though not a participant. No new levels of insights for me, just plain believing. Maybe someday.
Then I started to read Dee's Supernova series. And it just clicks. This is Redfield comprehensively and unbelievably and crazily rewritten. Damn, I love this! My mood of the week shifted to this watchamacallit thingy. I fell into Dee's world, meanwhile, Redfield's teaching came back in a rush. I even read some articles on Fungi and nu age. Hahaha.
So, it's only natural that I would think that all these have their own purpose. Dee's books, how I came across each articles, why I'm even writing this post. Everything might seem random for us mortals, but there must be some invisible pattern in the universe, don't you think? And come to think of it, I started to feel like I could grasp some of the pattern lately. At least, the things that happen in my life. You just have to 'see', not with your eyes, but also your 'eyes' if you know what I mean, *cheeky grin*.
Let's see. Out of nowhere, suddenly Dina texted me saying that she's in Kemang. At around 2 pm. I mean, come on, what can I do at 2 pm? I work at the office at least until 6 pm everyday. And it's not like she asked me to ge there and join her. Hahaa. So I just left it at that, with some question lurking. Then as usual I check my Twitter timeline from time to time. Somehow tweets about female taxi drivers popping intermittently. I left it at that also. When I finished work, because Crewcut was still in Bandung doing a project, I took a ride with Jimmy, intending to just reach the TransJ bus shelter nearby. In the car, we talked about his love affair, my crush on Wes, and risque relationship in general. What our own views on that, his being restricted by the religion, and how I was being more liberal than him. It's funny. He's a devout Moslem, but he's still doing this thing he's doing. :D
The conversation was getting deeper and before we knew it, we already reached Prapanca. How the heck was I going to get home from there? Along the street, there's no single vacant cab. He was going to Mampang, and he said he's passing Kemang. Suddenly I got an epiphany *yeah, right*, I texted Dina asking whether she was still at that cafe in Kemang. She said she was, so Jimmy dropped me off there and he went to pick up his wife. Somehow, it felt like a platonic affair, this weird relationship of mine with him. Hahahahahaa... Anyway, Dina was with her colleague, Aning. There's also Aning's friend from Jogja, Wahyu. He's totally new in Jakarta, but his courage deserved an applause. He went everywhere by public transport, even since his first day here. And this is only his third day. He was going to leave the cafe when I came in, but he had no clue about which public transport to take to get to his destination. So I came to his rescue and told him which angkots and buses he could take. See, there's apparently a reason why I was sent to that place. :D
Aaaand then, when they finished and we're about to pay, the place didn't accept cards. Cash only. The girls had no cash. I did. Once again, Bengal became their hero. Xixixixi... Who would have thought I would be of service like that? :p
Okay, I can't take it anymore. Let's just roll this through faster. We hailed a cab, and the driver is female. Ohmigosh. After all day reading tweets on female taxi drivers. How weirder could the day be? Weird, unless you believe in the above theory. Don't you think? :)))
A day of randomness, causalities... Synchronicity... Cosmic interference/direction? Okay, it IS weird. :/
PS: Would you believe it took me more than 2 months to write this fucking post?
I've been reading Dee's Supernova books for the past few days. I've finished Ksatria, Putri dan Bintang Jatuh and Akar and now about to start Petir. What she put into her stories are stuffs beyond my imagination. She somehow compiled so many seemingly syfy materials and rewrite it into her novels thus making it easy for her readers to understand the theories. Quantum physics, Freudian and the likes, Mandelbrot, I can't even recall the other names.
Her writings put me into a deja vu mode. Years ago, I read James Redfield's books. The first one was The Celestine Prophesy, followed by The Tenth Insight, then The Secret of Shambala. Basically, the first book told about many levels of insight. You need to go on your own journey to be able to acquire them. It's a somewhat spiritual journey. And you need to believe that everything in life is interconnected. There's always a reason behind every moment, every meeting, et cetera. Nothing is a coincidence. However small the event is, there is always a purpose behind it. To see the enhanced effect of a tiny event, think of The Butterfly Effect. ;) Redfield has made me a believer, though not a participant. No new levels of insights for me, just plain believing. Maybe someday.
Then I started to read Dee's Supernova series. And it just clicks. This is Redfield comprehensively and unbelievably and crazily rewritten. Damn, I love this! My mood of the week shifted to this watchamacallit thingy. I fell into Dee's world, meanwhile, Redfield's teaching came back in a rush. I even read some articles on Fungi and nu age. Hahaha.
So, it's only natural that I would think that all these have their own purpose. Dee's books, how I came across each articles, why I'm even writing this post. Everything might seem random for us mortals, but there must be some invisible pattern in the universe, don't you think? And come to think of it, I started to feel like I could grasp some of the pattern lately. At least, the things that happen in my life. You just have to 'see', not with your eyes, but also your 'eyes' if you know what I mean, *cheeky grin*.
Let's see. Out of nowhere, suddenly Dina texted me saying that she's in Kemang. At around 2 pm. I mean, come on, what can I do at 2 pm? I work at the office at least until 6 pm everyday. And it's not like she asked me to ge there and join her. Hahaa. So I just left it at that, with some question lurking. Then as usual I check my Twitter timeline from time to time. Somehow tweets about female taxi drivers popping intermittently. I left it at that also. When I finished work, because Crewcut was still in Bandung doing a project, I took a ride with Jimmy, intending to just reach the TransJ bus shelter nearby. In the car, we talked about his love affair, my crush on Wes, and risque relationship in general. What our own views on that, his being restricted by the religion, and how I was being more liberal than him. It's funny. He's a devout Moslem, but he's still doing this thing he's doing. :D
The conversation was getting deeper and before we knew it, we already reached Prapanca. How the heck was I going to get home from there? Along the street, there's no single vacant cab. He was going to Mampang, and he said he's passing Kemang. Suddenly I got an epiphany *yeah, right*, I texted Dina asking whether she was still at that cafe in Kemang. She said she was, so Jimmy dropped me off there and he went to pick up his wife. Somehow, it felt like a platonic affair, this weird relationship of mine with him. Hahahahahaa... Anyway, Dina was with her colleague, Aning. There's also Aning's friend from Jogja, Wahyu. He's totally new in Jakarta, but his courage deserved an applause. He went everywhere by public transport, even since his first day here. And this is only his third day. He was going to leave the cafe when I came in, but he had no clue about which public transport to take to get to his destination. So I came to his rescue and told him which angkots and buses he could take. See, there's apparently a reason why I was sent to that place. :D
Aaaand then, when they finished and we're about to pay, the place didn't accept cards. Cash only. The girls had no cash. I did. Once again, Bengal became their hero. Xixixixi... Who would have thought I would be of service like that? :p
Okay, I can't take it anymore. Let's just roll this through faster. We hailed a cab, and the driver is female. Ohmigosh. After all day reading tweets on female taxi drivers. How weirder could the day be? Weird, unless you believe in the above theory. Don't you think? :)))
A day of randomness, causalities... Synchronicity... Cosmic interference/direction? Okay, it IS weird. :/
PS: Would you believe it took me more than 2 months to write this fucking post?
Friday, July 06, 2012
Dream Theater - Another Day
Live another day
Climb a little higher
Find another reason to stay
Ashes in your hands
Mercy in your eyes
If you're searching for a silent sky...
You won't find it here
Look another way
You won't find it here
So die another day
The coldness of his words
The message in his silence,
'Face the candle to the wind...'
This distance in my voice
Isn't leaving you a choice
So if you're looking for a time to run away...
You won't find it here
Look another way
You won't find it here
So try another day
They took pictures of our dreams
Ran to hide behind the stairs
And said maybe when it's right for you, they'll fall
But if they don't come down
Resist the need to pull them in
And throw them away
Better to save the mystery
Than surrender to the secret
You won't find it here
Look another way
You won't find it here
So try another day
Climb a little higher
Find another reason to stay
Ashes in your hands
Mercy in your eyes
If you're searching for a silent sky...
You won't find it here
Look another way
You won't find it here
So die another day
The coldness of his words
The message in his silence,
'Face the candle to the wind...'
This distance in my voice
Isn't leaving you a choice
So if you're looking for a time to run away...
You won't find it here
Look another way
You won't find it here
So try another day
They took pictures of our dreams
Ran to hide behind the stairs
And said maybe when it's right for you, they'll fall
But if they don't come down
Resist the need to pull them in
And throw them away
Better to save the mystery
Than surrender to the secret
You won't find it here
Look another way
You won't find it here
So try another day
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Thursday, May 03, 2012
Quoting Johnny Depp
"If you love two people at the same time, choose the second one because if you really loved the first one, you wouldn't have fallen for the second."
Tuesday, May 01, 2012
Bengal is Exhilarated
Never thought would see the day that Bengal is feeling this lost. Again. Whoa... Hahaha... And all this is caused by one unexpected person. Yeah, you guessed right. The guy who had been dubbed as My Voice. Let's just call him Wes, yeah? :)
With some weird support from Jimmy, the supposedly devout but otherwise twisted, I started to try seducing Wes. Jeez, did I really just say 'seduce'? :/ What I mean is I'm trying to get closer to Wes. I think I genuinely like this guy. Indeed, I had been falling in lust with him. But what the heck, there's no other guy I'm attracted to at the moment. Why shouldn't it be Wes? Jimmy said that he's single, so for the first time in my adult life I'm doing someone kosher. So this is somewhat challenging for me. *grins*
So far, we've gone out to the movie once, with him stating that no one else from the office should know about it. But I had told Jim, anyway. Pffftt, me and my blabbermouth. We've been chatting on BBM a few times. And he's no longer working at my office, so I can't see him regularly anymore. *sobs*
Heck yeah! I missed feeling like this! Now, I feel alive, again. Yippeey!
To be or not to be with you, Wes, I'm glad you've managed to penetrate my barriers. THIS IS FUCKIN EXHILARATING!! :D
With some weird support from Jimmy, the supposedly devout but otherwise twisted, I started to try seducing Wes. Jeez, did I really just say 'seduce'? :/ What I mean is I'm trying to get closer to Wes. I think I genuinely like this guy. Indeed, I had been falling in lust with him. But what the heck, there's no other guy I'm attracted to at the moment. Why shouldn't it be Wes? Jimmy said that he's single, so for the first time in my adult life I'm doing someone kosher. So this is somewhat challenging for me. *grins*
So far, we've gone out to the movie once, with him stating that no one else from the office should know about it. But I had told Jim, anyway. Pffftt, me and my blabbermouth. We've been chatting on BBM a few times. And he's no longer working at my office, so I can't see him regularly anymore. *sobs*
Heck yeah! I missed feeling like this! Now, I feel alive, again. Yippeey!
To be or not to be with you, Wes, I'm glad you've managed to penetrate my barriers. THIS IS FUCKIN EXHILARATING!! :D
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
From The Voice to My Voice
Still captivated by his voice. Thankfully (or damnedly), not for a lot longer. I'll probably be able to hold it until next week. But, damn, I think I'm starting to get caught deeper into his net.
At first, I thought I could think of him only as The Voice. But for the past few days, we have talked about many things. Things I never knew could interest him. So it hasn't been all about work and silly jokes, but also a wide range of topics. On one day we talked about a gadget he recently acquired for his work, same kind of designing pad. Then on another day, we talked about the increasing rate of motorbike gangster that has been a terror in town. Yesterday, we discussed about conspiration theories, ranging from man-made 'natural disasters', Freemasonry and Illuminati, to NII and Jamaah Islamiyah.
And now somehow he had changed into My Voice. It's just that he's not mine. Shit. Have I fallen for him? Everyday I have difficulties restraining my limbs not to touch him. Not to hold him. Stupid Bengal. Shouldn't let an intelligent mind screw with me.
The Voice + Intelligence = Bengal's Doomsday...
Fuck me, please. Literally, honey... :'(
Thursday, April 05, 2012
New Voice In My Head
My team recruited a freelance designer for a project. He's actually one of our previous employees, but had resigned years ago. I didn't get any close to him at that time. And since working together for this project, I came to realize that he's got a killer voice.
Shit! Bengal fell hard. For his voice. Shiiiiiit...
We sat side by side for the past 2 or 3 weeks. Imagine how I have to suffer through this sensual Spanish Inquisition.
I don't know who had started this kinda flirty banter. Maybe I've been sending some sort of come hither signal or maybe he became kinda attracted to me, we've been verrry flirty for the past few weeks. A running joke is how we wished there weren't any cameras in the office.
'Pssst, Bengal!' he'd whispered in my ear.
'Huh?' I'd surprisedly looked at him and would find his lips only centimeters from mine.
'If there's no camera...' he'd left the sentence hanging, then he'd wink and grin.
I'd grin widely, 'I know. Pffft...'
We'd both stare back at our own notebook, but once or twice he'd graze my thigh oh so softly and silently laugh. That flirt! :D
And I still have to endure his deep voice every time he speaks.
Damn, flirting is fun! ;)
Shit! Bengal fell hard. For his voice. Shiiiiiit...
We sat side by side for the past 2 or 3 weeks. Imagine how I have to suffer through this sensual Spanish Inquisition.
I don't know who had started this kinda flirty banter. Maybe I've been sending some sort of come hither signal or maybe he became kinda attracted to me, we've been verrry flirty for the past few weeks. A running joke is how we wished there weren't any cameras in the office.
'Pssst, Bengal!' he'd whispered in my ear.
'Huh?' I'd surprisedly looked at him and would find his lips only centimeters from mine.
'If there's no camera...' he'd left the sentence hanging, then he'd wink and grin.
I'd grin widely, 'I know. Pffft...'
We'd both stare back at our own notebook, but once or twice he'd graze my thigh oh so softly and silently laugh. That flirt! :D
And I still have to endure his deep voice every time he speaks.
Damn, flirting is fun! ;)
Wednesday, March 07, 2012
Bengal Stres Deadline
Mendadak serangan mendadak dari kerjaan selama 1-2 minggu terakhir. Stres deadline yang sampe kebawa mimpi, sampe males makan. Aneh memang. Ini dilema buat gue. Di 1 sisi, berat gue turun dikit, di sisi yang lain gue beberapa kali melewatkan makanan enak tanpa ada penyesalan. Bener-bener bukan gue.
Help me. I just want to have my free time back. Sheeesh...
Gila aja, dari yang biasanya gue santai dan main terus, tau2 musti pegang 5 proyek sekaligus. Semuanya deadline, dan biarpun dikerjain satu per satu, bukannya load berkurang, malah nambah terus. Mamiiiii...
I miss Agy. I met him last Sunday by accident. I want him, now. Release me from this stress, pleeeease... T.T
Help me. I just want to have my free time back. Sheeesh...
Gila aja, dari yang biasanya gue santai dan main terus, tau2 musti pegang 5 proyek sekaligus. Semuanya deadline, dan biarpun dikerjain satu per satu, bukannya load berkurang, malah nambah terus. Mamiiiii...
I miss Agy. I met him last Sunday by accident. I want him, now. Release me from this stress, pleeeease... T.T
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