Sekarang bener2 tutup buku deh. Gue BBM-in ucapan Ramadhan ke Agy secara personal, soalnya gue gak suka pake broadcast message. Dari jawabannya yang singkat dan padat, kesimpulannya adalah cukup sampai disini. Close chat, tutup buku, hidup tenang. Mwehehehee... Gak tenang juga sih, secara masih penasaran sebenernya. Tapi kayaknya dari dia juga mati respon gitu, yaudah, mari kita sudahi sesi pendekatan yang udah berminggu2 gak ada hasilnya ini.
Konsentrasi sama ibadah puasa ya, Bengal. Jangan mikirin cowok2 mulu. Mendingan juga cari duit buat keliling dunia. ;)
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Beb, Beb, Bebeb...
Seriously, do not ever call me 'Beb' or 'Bebeb'. Coming from experience and observation, I find those so called endearments insulting. You know I work in event management. One important thing in the business is human resources, and one of them is Sales Promotion Girls/Boys. There are thousands of SPG in Jakarta only. Most of them know each other by face, but could hardly recall each others' names unless they are in the same agency or have been working together for a long period of time. So, unashamedly, they use 'Bebeb' to call their friends.
Once I asked a girl how did 'Bebeb' came into her vocabulary, and why she started to use it. She said that her friends started to use it first, and it's probably started by the wardrobe and make up gays who fussed over them. And voila! Everyone's name is Bebeb. Just call them Beb. Bleh...
If you say that Bebeb means 'Sayang,' hellooo... Maybe you mean 'Baby' ya? I use it only for the people I really care about, not to just about anyone. You'd only degrade the meaning of the word. It's called endearment for a reason, ya know, to endear someone. *sigh*
So, that's the reasons of why I so hate to be called Bebeb. It's awful. You can always ask my name if you don't know or forget. You think I'm too extreme? Too lebay? So be it. I am entitled to state my own opinion. And I have a right to not be called Bebeb. By ANYONE.
Thank you.
Once I asked a girl how did 'Bebeb' came into her vocabulary, and why she started to use it. She said that her friends started to use it first, and it's probably started by the wardrobe and make up gays who fussed over them. And voila! Everyone's name is Bebeb. Just call them Beb. Bleh...
If you say that Bebeb means 'Sayang,' hellooo... Maybe you mean 'Baby' ya? I use it only for the people I really care about, not to just about anyone. You'd only degrade the meaning of the word. It's called endearment for a reason, ya know, to endear someone. *sigh*
So, that's the reasons of why I so hate to be called Bebeb. It's awful. You can always ask my name if you don't know or forget. You think I'm too extreme? Too lebay? So be it. I am entitled to state my own opinion. And I have a right to not be called Bebeb. By ANYONE.
Thank you.
Friday, July 29, 2011
The Script - If You Ever Come Back
This time, I'm in The Script fever. Can't stop listening to their songs. Very enjoyable music, and I like the lyric. Plus, the vocalist looks awesome too. :D
Here's one of their songs, If You Ever Come Back.
And here's the lyric:
Here's one of their songs, If You Ever Come Back.
And here's the lyric:
IF YOU EVER COME BACK - THE SCRIPT
If you're standing with your suitcase
But you can't step on the train
Everything's the way that you left it
I still haven't slept yet
And if you're covering your face now
But you just can't hide the pain
Still setting two plates on the counter but eating without you
If the truth is you're a liar
Then just say that you're okay
I'm sleeping on your side of the bed
Goin' out of my head now
And if you're out there trying to move on
But something pulls you back again
I'm sitting here trying to persuade you like you're in the same room
And I wish you could give me the cold shoulder
And I wish you could still give me a hard time
And I wish I could still wish it was over
But even if wishing is a waste of time
Even if I never cross your mind
I'll leave the door on the latch
If you ever come back, if you ever come back
There'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back
There'll be a smile on my face and the kettle on
And it will be just like you were never gone
There'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back if you ever come back now
Oh if you ever come back if you ever come back
Now they say I'm wasting my time
'Cause you're never comin' home
But they used to say the world was flat
But how wrong was that now?
And by leavin' my door open
I'm riskin' everything I own
There's nothing I can lose in a break-in that you haven't taken
And I wish you could give me the cold shoulder
And I wish you can still give me a hard time
And I wish I could still wish it was over
But even if wishing is a waste of time
Even if I never cross your mind
I'll leave the door on the latch
If you ever come back, if you ever come back
There'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back
There'll be a smile on my face and the kettle on
And it will be just like you were never gone
There'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back, if you ever come back now
Oh, if you ever come back, if you ever come back
If it's the fighting you remember or the little things you miss
I know you're out there somewhere so just remember this
If it's the fighting you remember or the little things you miss
Oh just remember this, oh just remember this
I'll leave the door on the latch
If you ever come back, if you ever come back
There'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back
There'll be a smile on my face and the kettle on
And it will be just like you were never gone
There'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back, if you ever come back now
Oh, if you ever come back, if you ever come back
And it will be just like you were never gone
And it will be just like you were never gone
And it will be just like you were never gone
If you ever come back, if you ever come back now
But you can't step on the train
Everything's the way that you left it
I still haven't slept yet
And if you're covering your face now
But you just can't hide the pain
Still setting two plates on the counter but eating without you
If the truth is you're a liar
Then just say that you're okay
I'm sleeping on your side of the bed
Goin' out of my head now
And if you're out there trying to move on
But something pulls you back again
I'm sitting here trying to persuade you like you're in the same room
And I wish you could give me the cold shoulder
And I wish you could still give me a hard time
And I wish I could still wish it was over
But even if wishing is a waste of time
Even if I never cross your mind
I'll leave the door on the latch
If you ever come back, if you ever come back
There'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back
There'll be a smile on my face and the kettle on
And it will be just like you were never gone
There'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back if you ever come back now
Oh if you ever come back if you ever come back
Now they say I'm wasting my time
'Cause you're never comin' home
But they used to say the world was flat
But how wrong was that now?
And by leavin' my door open
I'm riskin' everything I own
There's nothing I can lose in a break-in that you haven't taken
And I wish you could give me the cold shoulder
And I wish you can still give me a hard time
And I wish I could still wish it was over
But even if wishing is a waste of time
Even if I never cross your mind
I'll leave the door on the latch
If you ever come back, if you ever come back
There'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back
There'll be a smile on my face and the kettle on
And it will be just like you were never gone
There'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back, if you ever come back now
Oh, if you ever come back, if you ever come back
If it's the fighting you remember or the little things you miss
I know you're out there somewhere so just remember this
If it's the fighting you remember or the little things you miss
Oh just remember this, oh just remember this
I'll leave the door on the latch
If you ever come back, if you ever come back
There'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back
There'll be a smile on my face and the kettle on
And it will be just like you were never gone
There'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back, if you ever come back now
Oh, if you ever come back, if you ever come back
And it will be just like you were never gone
And it will be just like you were never gone
And it will be just like you were never gone
If you ever come back, if you ever come back now
Nyekar Rock n Roll
Alhamdulillah akhirnya kemaren berhasil nyekar ke makam keluarga gue. Secara pulang kerja pasti macet, gue minta tolong CrewCut nganterin gue pake motornya siang2 gitu ke makam, karena lokasinya juga gak jauh2 amat sih dari kantor. Untung dia mau. :)
Pas sampe di makam, gue beli bunga sekeranjang plus beberapa botol air mawar, karena selain bokap n nyokap gue, di makam itu juga ada 2 kakak sulung gue plus eyang gue, dan beberapa saudara yang lain. Pertama gue nyekar ke makam nyokap dan kakak2 gue. CrewCut ikut kirim doa. Yang bikin agak aneh kok nih anak mendadak diem kayak lagi kenapa gitu. Di makam masih tersebar kelopak2 bunga dan daun yang udah mengering, mungkin sisa dari kakak gue yang nyekar minggu lalu. Makam kakak gue sisi2nya agak keropos, entah tanahnya yang kering atau karena para penghuni liar di kompleks pemakaman itu yang sembarangan tiduran atau duduk disitu. :(( Berasa kangennya sama nyokap deh. Biasanya kalo udah deket lebaran, pasti kita bikin masak untuk sajian ke keluarga dan tamu yang dateng ke rumah. Secara nyokap dan bokap masing2 adalah orang yang dituakan di keluarga masing2, maka kita pasti open house tiap lebaran. Nyokap dapet bagian bikin masakan kayak rendang, sayur labu dll dst dsb, segala macam masakan yang gue males banget ngerjainnya karena gue gak suka tangan gue kotor sama bumbu. Hehee... Sementara gue dapet bagian bikin macam2 cookies dan cake. Gue paling seneng wangi cookies yang lagi dipanggang di oven. Mmmmmhhh... Sayang aja oven di rumah udah gak sekeren dulu. Pengen deh bikin cookies and cake lagi. Dijamin pada doyan dan heran, ternyata gue jago juga masaknya. Biasanya sih orang2 emang pada gak percaya kalo gue kasih cookies buatan gue. Pada gak tau aja kalo gue ini maestro. Hmm... :p
Dari makam nyokap, gue pindah nyekar ke makam bokap dan eyang kakung yang letaknya bersebelahan. Gue cabutin rumput kering dan bersihin sedikit makamnya. Setelah itu baru siram air mawar dan tabur bunga. CrewCut agak banyak nanya2 tentang siapa aja keluarga gue yang dimakamin disitu. Gue cerita macem2 sambil kita duduk di samping makam bokap. Gue paling kangen sama bokap, mungkin karena emang gue paling dekat sama bokap dari sejak kecil. He's my hero, my first love, the one I want my guy one day to be like. Anak papa banget deh gue. :p Bokap adalah orang yang cenderung diam tapi selalu terasa kehadirannya. Gue orang yang paling gak pernah curhat ke keluarga gue. Tapi kalo lagi galau, gue ajak aja bokap hangout berdua kemana gitu. Entah nonton ke bioskop, atau makan ke KFC, atau sok2an nonton live music di kafe. Tapi ya gue kira2 juga. Cari live musicnya juga yang rada musik2 evergreen gitu deh istilahnya. Gak mungkin kan bokap gue ajak dengerin musik yang hardcore atau hip hop? Hehee... Kalo lagi hangout sama bokap, gue cuek aja minum alcoholic drinks, karena beliau percaya sama gue, lagian kan gue minumnya ditemenin sama bokap. Jadi takarannya ketauan. Malah kadang bokap pesen minuman, gue yang disuruh minum. 'Kamu harus coba semua, Bengal. Yang penting tau rasanya, tapi jangan sampe mabok atau jadi alcoholic. Yang penting kamu tau batas. Nih, cobain Whisky Cola punya Papa.' Hihi, bokap gue emang rock n roll abis. I love you, Pa. :*
Di perjalanan balik ke kantor, baru deh si CrewCut cerita kalo dia tadi di makam diajak ngobrol sama eyang dan keluarga gue, termasuk bokap n nyokap. Katanya dia dititipin gue. *Dueeeeenggg!!*
-______-'
"Haaaaahhhh???? Maksud looo???' Gue kaget setengah idup dengernya.
'Ya itu. Tadi bokap lo seneng banget lo datengin dan doain beliau ke makamnya. Terus yang di sebelah bokap itu eyang lo ya? Wataknya mirip gitu berdua. Masa beliau nitipin lo ke gue, Ngal. Abis eyang lo bilang gitu, yang lain pada ngikut juga nitipin lo ke gue. Ya bokap, nyokap, kakak lo, sampe eyang putri lo yang di Jawa juga tadi ada.'
Gue langsung cengo dong. Pas denger bahwa bokap gue seneng gue datengin, gue sempet speechless dan pengen nangis. Rasanya legaaaaa banget denger bokap seneng. Aneh ya. Ngetik ini aja sekarang mata gue jadi berkaca2 lagi. Hiks... Tapi yang gue bingung, kenapa gue malah dititipin ke dia ya? Malah mustinya kan pada marah ke kita, secara kita berdua badung gitu. Terus CrewCut bilang kalo nyokap gue udah tau. Tapi tetep aja ikutan nitipin gue, bukannya malah murka gimana gitu. Oh, even di alam lain, keluarga gue pun tetep rock n roll. Yasalaaam...
Dan jujur, kejadian hari itu sukses membuat gue tercenung dan bengong. Percaya gak percaya, tapi CrewCut emang bisa komunikasi dengan alam lain tersebut. Kalo di kantor ato daerah rumahnya ada orang lagi kesurupan aja pasti dia yang nyembuhin. Tengil2 gitu tapi sakti. Kadang keliatan blo'on tapi sakti. Emang orang sakti itu sakti ya. *Kayaknya gue mulai melantur deh* Oh, well. Yah begitulah ceritanya. Gue gak tau apa ada hal lain yang dia gak ceritain ke gue. Yang jelas dia juga bilang kalo watak bokap dan gue mirip. Itu aja gue uda seneng. Hehee...
Makasih ya CrewCut, udah nemenin gue nyekar, eh pake apes ketitipan gue oleh almarhum keluarga gue. :)
Pas sampe di makam, gue beli bunga sekeranjang plus beberapa botol air mawar, karena selain bokap n nyokap gue, di makam itu juga ada 2 kakak sulung gue plus eyang gue, dan beberapa saudara yang lain. Pertama gue nyekar ke makam nyokap dan kakak2 gue. CrewCut ikut kirim doa. Yang bikin agak aneh kok nih anak mendadak diem kayak lagi kenapa gitu. Di makam masih tersebar kelopak2 bunga dan daun yang udah mengering, mungkin sisa dari kakak gue yang nyekar minggu lalu. Makam kakak gue sisi2nya agak keropos, entah tanahnya yang kering atau karena para penghuni liar di kompleks pemakaman itu yang sembarangan tiduran atau duduk disitu. :(( Berasa kangennya sama nyokap deh. Biasanya kalo udah deket lebaran, pasti kita bikin masak untuk sajian ke keluarga dan tamu yang dateng ke rumah. Secara nyokap dan bokap masing2 adalah orang yang dituakan di keluarga masing2, maka kita pasti open house tiap lebaran. Nyokap dapet bagian bikin masakan kayak rendang, sayur labu dll dst dsb, segala macam masakan yang gue males banget ngerjainnya karena gue gak suka tangan gue kotor sama bumbu. Hehee... Sementara gue dapet bagian bikin macam2 cookies dan cake. Gue paling seneng wangi cookies yang lagi dipanggang di oven. Mmmmmhhh... Sayang aja oven di rumah udah gak sekeren dulu. Pengen deh bikin cookies and cake lagi. Dijamin pada doyan dan heran, ternyata gue jago juga masaknya. Biasanya sih orang2 emang pada gak percaya kalo gue kasih cookies buatan gue. Pada gak tau aja kalo gue ini maestro. Hmm... :p
Dari makam nyokap, gue pindah nyekar ke makam bokap dan eyang kakung yang letaknya bersebelahan. Gue cabutin rumput kering dan bersihin sedikit makamnya. Setelah itu baru siram air mawar dan tabur bunga. CrewCut agak banyak nanya2 tentang siapa aja keluarga gue yang dimakamin disitu. Gue cerita macem2 sambil kita duduk di samping makam bokap. Gue paling kangen sama bokap, mungkin karena emang gue paling dekat sama bokap dari sejak kecil. He's my hero, my first love, the one I want my guy one day to be like. Anak papa banget deh gue. :p Bokap adalah orang yang cenderung diam tapi selalu terasa kehadirannya. Gue orang yang paling gak pernah curhat ke keluarga gue. Tapi kalo lagi galau, gue ajak aja bokap hangout berdua kemana gitu. Entah nonton ke bioskop, atau makan ke KFC, atau sok2an nonton live music di kafe. Tapi ya gue kira2 juga. Cari live musicnya juga yang rada musik2 evergreen gitu deh istilahnya. Gak mungkin kan bokap gue ajak dengerin musik yang hardcore atau hip hop? Hehee... Kalo lagi hangout sama bokap, gue cuek aja minum alcoholic drinks, karena beliau percaya sama gue, lagian kan gue minumnya ditemenin sama bokap. Jadi takarannya ketauan. Malah kadang bokap pesen minuman, gue yang disuruh minum. 'Kamu harus coba semua, Bengal. Yang penting tau rasanya, tapi jangan sampe mabok atau jadi alcoholic. Yang penting kamu tau batas. Nih, cobain Whisky Cola punya Papa.' Hihi, bokap gue emang rock n roll abis. I love you, Pa. :*
Di perjalanan balik ke kantor, baru deh si CrewCut cerita kalo dia tadi di makam diajak ngobrol sama eyang dan keluarga gue, termasuk bokap n nyokap. Katanya dia dititipin gue. *Dueeeeenggg!!*
-______-'
"Haaaaahhhh???? Maksud looo???' Gue kaget setengah idup dengernya.
'Ya itu. Tadi bokap lo seneng banget lo datengin dan doain beliau ke makamnya. Terus yang di sebelah bokap itu eyang lo ya? Wataknya mirip gitu berdua. Masa beliau nitipin lo ke gue, Ngal. Abis eyang lo bilang gitu, yang lain pada ngikut juga nitipin lo ke gue. Ya bokap, nyokap, kakak lo, sampe eyang putri lo yang di Jawa juga tadi ada.'
Gue langsung cengo dong. Pas denger bahwa bokap gue seneng gue datengin, gue sempet speechless dan pengen nangis. Rasanya legaaaaa banget denger bokap seneng. Aneh ya. Ngetik ini aja sekarang mata gue jadi berkaca2 lagi. Hiks... Tapi yang gue bingung, kenapa gue malah dititipin ke dia ya? Malah mustinya kan pada marah ke kita, secara kita berdua badung gitu. Terus CrewCut bilang kalo nyokap gue udah tau. Tapi tetep aja ikutan nitipin gue, bukannya malah murka gimana gitu. Oh, even di alam lain, keluarga gue pun tetep rock n roll. Yasalaaam...
Dan jujur, kejadian hari itu sukses membuat gue tercenung dan bengong. Percaya gak percaya, tapi CrewCut emang bisa komunikasi dengan alam lain tersebut. Kalo di kantor ato daerah rumahnya ada orang lagi kesurupan aja pasti dia yang nyembuhin. Tengil2 gitu tapi sakti. Kadang keliatan blo'on tapi sakti. Emang orang sakti itu sakti ya. *Kayaknya gue mulai melantur deh* Oh, well. Yah begitulah ceritanya. Gue gak tau apa ada hal lain yang dia gak ceritain ke gue. Yang jelas dia juga bilang kalo watak bokap dan gue mirip. Itu aja gue uda seneng. Hehee...
Makasih ya CrewCut, udah nemenin gue nyekar, eh pake apes ketitipan gue oleh almarhum keluarga gue. :)
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Pedas: Lidah vs Perut
Kontradiksi adalah saat lidah lo mengirimkan sinyal bahwa rasa masakannya masih kurang pedas. sementara perut sudah mulai mules dan berontak. Hiks...
Jadi gue tadi makan bakso pake sambel yang banyak. Eh, tapi kalo kata anak2 sih sebenernya gue makan sambel pake bakso. Dan pas gue minta nambah kuah, gue lupa kalo abangnya udah ngasih sambel yang banyak, eh malah gue tambahin sambelnya. Sumpah rasanya jadi kayak dinamit. Lidah gue sih masih tahan, malah rasanya seru banget. Cuma ternyata perut gue yang menjerit. Kelar makan, gak sampe 5 menit gue udah ambil posisi wuenak di toilet. Wuahahahahaa...
Temen gue yang doyan pedes nyobain kuah bakso gue sesendok, langsung ngambek gitu. Hihihihi...
Tapi sekarang gue pengen banget makan nasi plus sambalnya Bu Rudy. Hiks...
*gak kapok2*
Jadi gue tadi makan bakso pake sambel yang banyak. Eh, tapi kalo kata anak2 sih sebenernya gue makan sambel pake bakso. Dan pas gue minta nambah kuah, gue lupa kalo abangnya udah ngasih sambel yang banyak, eh malah gue tambahin sambelnya. Sumpah rasanya jadi kayak dinamit. Lidah gue sih masih tahan, malah rasanya seru banget. Cuma ternyata perut gue yang menjerit. Kelar makan, gak sampe 5 menit gue udah ambil posisi wuenak di toilet. Wuahahahahaa...
Temen gue yang doyan pedes nyobain kuah bakso gue sesendok, langsung ngambek gitu. Hihihihi...
Tapi sekarang gue pengen banget makan nasi plus sambalnya Bu Rudy. Hiks...
*gak kapok2*
Friday, July 22, 2011
Revelation
Revelation. What a word. What would you do when you found out that nothing is as it seems? Yeah, I know. Nothing IS as it seems. Ever. So, why would I be surprised? It's just I wouldn't have expected this, from my own best friend nonetheless. Feeling betrayed? Somewhat.
Well, it's not that bad, actually. She just suddenly decided to be more her own person. Which she apparently hadn't been in all these years of friendship with me and Kucil. Which we didn't know until now. Some friends we are, huh? :( Now all we have to do is to adapt and adjust. :/
Well, it's not that bad, actually. She just suddenly decided to be more her own person. Which she apparently hadn't been in all these years of friendship with me and Kucil. Which we didn't know until now. Some friends we are, huh? :( Now all we have to do is to adapt and adjust. :/
Thursday, July 21, 2011
07212011; 07:07 pm
Ternyata kalo makan dalam keadaan emosi tuh jadinya kacau ya... Hehee. Jadi tadi siang makan nasi padang. Terus tadi sore beli pisang goreng dan kolak durian. Ehh, temen gue dateng ke kantor bawain pizza dan fusilli dari Pizza Hut. Ampun... Perut gue rasanya mau meledak sekarang. :p
Sekarang kekenyangan, terus dengerin lagu sambil cek timeline di Twitter. It's hilarious seeing how some people trying to sound smart and sophisticated while in fact they sound stupid and illiterate instead. Pathetic. And that is such an entertainment for me. Yeah, I'm that bad, I know. So, sue me. Wew...
Had an interesting convo this morning with someone close to me. Apparently we had a mutual opinion on something. Hmm, interesting... *misterius amat sih, Ngal?* :p
Oh well. Gotta go. People to see, places to be. Tataa... *blowing kisses*
Sekarang kekenyangan, terus dengerin lagu sambil cek timeline di Twitter. It's hilarious seeing how some people trying to sound smart and sophisticated while in fact they sound stupid and illiterate instead. Pathetic. And that is such an entertainment for me. Yeah, I'm that bad, I know. So, sue me. Wew...
Had an interesting convo this morning with someone close to me. Apparently we had a mutual opinion on something. Hmm, interesting... *misterius amat sih, Ngal?* :p
Oh well. Gotta go. People to see, places to be. Tataa... *blowing kisses*
Keeping Up or Letting Go?
Bingung sendiri. Sebenernya gue yang berubah atau dia yang berubah ya? Akhir2 ini suka kaget plus gak nyaman dengan apa yang ada. Jangan salah, ini bukan tentang kerjaan kok. Yaah, untungnya sih bukan. Hahaa... Perubahan itu bagus. Hidup terus berjalan. Semuanya tumbuh, berkembang, berevolusi. Entah gue yang terjebak di zona nyaman selama bertahun2 terakhir, atau mungkin juga satu hal ajaib ini yang mendadak melakukan revolusi. Yak, gue bilang revolusi, bukan evolusi. Terlalu cepat. Gue gak yakin bisa mengikuti perubahannya. Dan jujur gue gak nyaman dengan hal tersebut. Gue berusaha tetap membuka pikiran gue, bahwa ini adalah hal yang baik. Gue masih dalam proses mencerna supaya bisa menerima dan beradaptasi dengan baik. Tapi kadang muncul rasa gak sabar. Kadang muncul pikiran buruk dan memutuskan untuk melepaskan hal tersebut. I wish I could just decide not to keep up with it and just let it go. Tapi kemudian gue pasti bakal pikir2 lagi dan terus mencoba dan mencoba untuk sabar. See, dari tulisan di atas pasti kesimpulannya adalah perubahan bukan ada di gue. At least that's what I've been thinking. Tapi gue selalu berusaha berpikir dari 2 sisi. Dari sudut pandang gue sendiri, dan dari sudut pandang counterpart gue. Setiap orang pasti ada sisi defensif, dan gue yakin kebanyakan manusia ingin stay the same. Mungkin ada hubungannya dengan konsistensi. Lo akan lebih dipercaya kalau konsisten, gak berubah-ubah. Makanya kalo dibilang, 'lo berubah!', mungkin 90 persen bakal bilang, 'gak, gue gak berubah. Lo kali yang berubah!' Kalo gue yang digituin, semoga gue bisa introspeksi dan gak langsung ngeles aja. Amin. Meanwhile, sebenernya yang berubah itu siapa? Gue atau lo? Gue sampe segini gak nyaman karena kadar kekagetannya nyaris menyamai waktu temen SMA gue buka jilbab dan jadi party animal, *gubrak*. Buat gue, perubahannya memang terlihat drastis. Dan semoga gue bisa tetap bertahan waras dan gak nurutin emosi yang bikin males. Amin...
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Blue Moods. PMS?
Blue moods again. Really not a good time to be in this mood. Need to bounce back. Damn...
Always hate when it's like this. I hope this is just PMS. Amen...
Always hate when it's like this. I hope this is just PMS. Amen...
Saturday, July 09, 2011
Still Can Taste It
I still couldn't hardly believe that he kissed me there. In a bright Domino's outlet. And that I can still taste his lips on mine, even now.
God...
God...
Thursday, July 07, 2011
Bengal's Midweek Date
Yesterday was surreal. I went to the office, alone until noon. Then the other guys said that they're gonna meet up at a coffee shop to work. I asked if I was really needed to be there, otherwise I'd better stay at office. Well, they said no, so I just hung around at my desk. At about 2 pm I left and went to a salon to have my hair washed and blown. Never would I have thought that it was to be the best decision I made that day. :p
When my hair was being blown dry, Agy texted me and asked where I was. He said he was free and whether I would like to meet him somewhere. Whoa. I thought, why the heck not? So I answered that I was already off work and that I was heading to my favorite mall in South Jakarta. He then said he'd be there soon after he took care of things at his studio. I arrived first and bought a novel, then I hung around at the outdoor food court whilst reading and sipping lemonade. It was bliss.
And then he came. Said hi, hugged me and kissed my cheeks, then started talking as if we were friends. Weird for me, because I never really considered him as my friend. He had always been Syd's brother's best friend. And then he became an almost lover. When that was over, it felt like we were exes, you know. Exes who had some kind of grudges. Just plain weird. *sigh* But then he acted as if we were fine. Well, I could trace there had been a hard feeling, but let bygones be bygones. So yeah, we're like 2 newly-reacquainted persons enjoying a time together.
At the food court, we mainly talked lightly and basically just catching up. We ordered nothing but my cold drink which we finished together. I asked about his works. He enlightened me about an aspect that he loved which was the opportunity to learn and observe things. By just doing what he loved and did best. I think he's lucky. And the longer we talked, the more I realized how he'd grown more mature. He still looked the same as always. The angles on his face hardened a bit, but also gotten rounder as he had gained weight. Overall, he looked fine. Not that he was good looking. Hahaa...
We we getting hungry so we decided to move to a pizza joint nearby. It was deserted, we're the only dine-in customers there. All the better, hey? The ambience was kinda intimate. He put an arm round my shoulder. We didn't talk much, just eating and enjoying each other's presence. For once, I kept staring at him. He probably felt uncomfortable with my stares, but I couldn't help it. I was still trying to comprehend that it's really him sitting beside me, eating a pizza slice, with his arm around me. In a way, I was trying to memorize all things. His face, his voice, the scent around us, the lighting, and his kisses. Well, by the time the food were finished, he hugged me, butterfly-kissed my temple, smoothing my hair. Just like a normal couple. A normal couple that had been together for years, not hours. LOL.
At last, I got a glimpse of how it would be like if we had been together. Strangely familiar. Familiarly strange. He's like a conundrum I can't solve. Too many contradictions. Too many to be taken into consideration. Maybe it's better if I left it as it was. Much as I want to see what could happen, I don't think I could handle disappointments at the moment. *sigh*
So, I just enjoyed the time. He pulled out his laptop and finished some part of his work while I continued reading my book. Once in a while, one of us would put teasing touches. Playful touches. Invisible to all the the other people at the joint, but Agy and I could totally felt it. Risky business, haha... Then, he put his left hand on my thigh, and I play my right hand on the back of his neck. Each trying to break the other's concentration. :p Before we knew it, it was already 11 pm, and we decided to wrap the night. He swiftly kissed my lips right there. Twice. My heart stopped. Until now, I still hope there's no one saw us kissing. Those kisses were too short. And I wanted more. Way to go, Gy... :/
Holding hands, we left and caught a taxi. Then we went our separate ways.
When my hair was being blown dry, Agy texted me and asked where I was. He said he was free and whether I would like to meet him somewhere. Whoa. I thought, why the heck not? So I answered that I was already off work and that I was heading to my favorite mall in South Jakarta. He then said he'd be there soon after he took care of things at his studio. I arrived first and bought a novel, then I hung around at the outdoor food court whilst reading and sipping lemonade. It was bliss.
And then he came. Said hi, hugged me and kissed my cheeks, then started talking as if we were friends. Weird for me, because I never really considered him as my friend. He had always been Syd's brother's best friend. And then he became an almost lover. When that was over, it felt like we were exes, you know. Exes who had some kind of grudges. Just plain weird. *sigh* But then he acted as if we were fine. Well, I could trace there had been a hard feeling, but let bygones be bygones. So yeah, we're like 2 newly-reacquainted persons enjoying a time together.
At the food court, we mainly talked lightly and basically just catching up. We ordered nothing but my cold drink which we finished together. I asked about his works. He enlightened me about an aspect that he loved which was the opportunity to learn and observe things. By just doing what he loved and did best. I think he's lucky. And the longer we talked, the more I realized how he'd grown more mature. He still looked the same as always. The angles on his face hardened a bit, but also gotten rounder as he had gained weight. Overall, he looked fine. Not that he was good looking. Hahaa...
We we getting hungry so we decided to move to a pizza joint nearby. It was deserted, we're the only dine-in customers there. All the better, hey? The ambience was kinda intimate. He put an arm round my shoulder. We didn't talk much, just eating and enjoying each other's presence. For once, I kept staring at him. He probably felt uncomfortable with my stares, but I couldn't help it. I was still trying to comprehend that it's really him sitting beside me, eating a pizza slice, with his arm around me. In a way, I was trying to memorize all things. His face, his voice, the scent around us, the lighting, and his kisses. Well, by the time the food were finished, he hugged me, butterfly-kissed my temple, smoothing my hair. Just like a normal couple. A normal couple that had been together for years, not hours. LOL.
At last, I got a glimpse of how it would be like if we had been together. Strangely familiar. Familiarly strange. He's like a conundrum I can't solve. Too many contradictions. Too many to be taken into consideration. Maybe it's better if I left it as it was. Much as I want to see what could happen, I don't think I could handle disappointments at the moment. *sigh*
So, I just enjoyed the time. He pulled out his laptop and finished some part of his work while I continued reading my book. Once in a while, one of us would put teasing touches. Playful touches. Invisible to all the the other people at the joint, but Agy and I could totally felt it. Risky business, haha... Then, he put his left hand on my thigh, and I play my right hand on the back of his neck. Each trying to break the other's concentration. :p Before we knew it, it was already 11 pm, and we decided to wrap the night. He swiftly kissed my lips right there. Twice. My heart stopped. Until now, I still hope there's no one saw us kissing. Those kisses were too short. And I wanted more. Way to go, Gy... :/
Holding hands, we left and caught a taxi. Then we went our separate ways.
Tuesday, July 05, 2011
07052011, 03:15 pm
Ngemall lagi gara2 di kantor kosong. Sebagian tim lagi ada kerjaan di luar kota, jadi anak kantor yang tersisa memutuskan untuk kerja di mall deh. Hehee... Kali ini kita memilih salah satu mall baru di daerah Jakarta Selatan. Disitu wifinya canggih. Even lo nongkrong di toilet juga dapat wifi kali. :p
So, I just got back from my leave, practically no work yesterday and spent the day just playing FV and napping at office, and now I'm hanging out in a cafe. Sort of. Life's good, no? ;)
So, I just got back from my leave, practically no work yesterday and spent the day just playing FV and napping at office, and now I'm hanging out in a cafe. Sort of. Life's good, no? ;)
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